Person blackmailing Letterman's defence...

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You know about Occam’s Razor, right? The theory dictating that the best explanation for a situation is often the simplest one? That 700-year-old saw emerged today as the one accused David Letterman extortionist Robert “Joe” Halderman is paying big bucks for as part of his defense strategy, with his attorneys explaining that Halderman really was simply trying to sell Letterman a script about the host’s dalliances with his staff when he asked him for $2 million.

Halderman’s defense attorney Gerald Shargel today appeared with his client in a Manhattan court, where the lawyer filed a motion to dismiss the pending grand larceny charges against Halderman. He’d been misunderstood, Shargel argued: That set of meetings between Halderman and Letterman was meant to interest the talk-show host in a script about his own story — one which Letterman surely couldn’t have wanted to produce, but still. Producers buy material to bury it all the time, don’t they?

Yes, but not quite like this, with damning materials left in Letterman’s car and seven-figure checks hand-delivered by the script’s subject in person. No matter! As Shargel also noted today, Halderman was entrapped during his fateful final meeting with Letterman. Moreover, he added, the press has tainted this case beyond the point of no return for any jury, and his client has no chance at justice under the circumstances.

Shargel may have a point about the jury, especially now that everybody knows the ideal new way to sell a hot script about Letterman’s backstage swordsmanship is to feed it to Twitter in installments. If @LateShowOrgy is taken, think of something else. Blackmail is so antiquated, so impractical, so… Leno at 10.

Doesn't matter how you look at it, the words butt-fucked still come to mind. What a lame ass excuse to come up with.